remembering...

Today is a bit of a sad day for Kenny and me. One of the sweetest women who adopted Kenny when he started working at Second Baptist so many years ago is now finally cancer free and in the presence of our savior. We have been following her husband's posts of her course of treatment and were able to see her and her husband last night before she passed.

This morning when I awoke to a post stating that she had "gone home", and even all day yesterday after learning she had been moved to palliative care I was struck by how emotional I became. Let me be honest, I've known and loved Kenny for a bit over 3 years, but this family has known him for probably twice that.

Some of my first memories of dating Kenny involve sitting next to or behind this wonderful family in church. This family of four, (even with their matriarch gone this will always be a family of four), was there to celebrate with us at our wedding, to wish us luck and send us off on our journey to Chicago, and to welcome us back to Texas when God's plans led us back. This family even helped to provide basic necessities for Kenny when he first came to Houston and was starting out (i.e a bed and comforter set). I am struck by how giving and loving this family is, even in the midst of their trials they still had us over for dinner last summer (I regret that it had been so long since we'd seen them) and encouraged us in the midst of our own wilderness.

I guess I could easily blame the outpouring of emotion on pregnancy hormones, and frankly that's probably part of it, but I think it runs much deeper than just an excess of hormones in my body. This family, and especially this sweet woman, were so much a family to Kenny before I even knew him. How do you express your gratitude to someone who clearly loved and cared for your spouse when you weren't even aware of his existence? The glory and thanksgiving need to be given to God, and I know Tracy would agree.

When we heard that the cancer had returned, we were still in Chicago and I remember mentally preparing myself to send Kenny to Texas for a funeral. However God is gracious and merciful and granted this family another year-plus together to love on each other and grow together. God clearly fathered and mothered this family during these last weeks that must have been so difficult to bear on her husband and sons. I know what it's like to lose a father, but I can't imagine losing the person that I love most on this earth.

When I asked Kenny what his favorite memories of Tracy and her family were, he couldn't pinpoint exact instances, but was quick to point out their hospitality, generosity, and willingness to help house summer interns. Tracy has had such a huge impact on my husband's life, and I am inspired to want to have a similar impact on the lives of those around me. I didn't know Tracy well, but I know that she lived her life to follow Christ as best she could and loved on those around her whenever she could.

If you get to the bottom of this lengthy brain dump, please take a minute and say a prayer of comfort for Tracy's family, her husband, sons, parents, siblings, and her adopted family of so many individuals. Last night her husband said something that stuck with me, he said "we are sad for us, but happy for her that she gets to be cancer free". Praise God that Tracy is finally free!

"and those the Lord has rescued will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away" Isaiah 35:10

officially a growed up

Good Monday Morning to you!

 Things around the "R" house have been more of the same lately. Kenny and I are still waiting on God's timing for his job but we know that it will come at the perfect time.

 Yesterday our pastor again preached on God's promises using 2 Corinthians 1:20 "For no matter how may promises God has made, they are "yes" in Christ. And so through him the "amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God." It can be so easy for us to forget that God always keeps his promises. The promises he made in the old Testament were fulfilled in Christ and when we are in Christ God will see all his promises to fruition in us. Curtis used an illustration that I really liked, he said that often we can only see a few steps in front of us, and a few steps behind, so it may seem like we're always in the dark. However God sees the whole path and tells us to trust that He will bring us into the light. Definitely a word that I needed to hear yesterday for sure.

 As I was perusing through 2 Corinthians I found another verse that I had marked and definitely needed to hear:
 "therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. Four our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

It would be so easy for us to focus on the outward troubles, but I am so thankful that the Lord is leading Kenny and me and keeping us focused inward and upward.

 Meanwhile back at the homestead...

Work for me has been nuts lately, my awesome SLP took a job closer to "home" (and by home I mean where her heart is) so I've been managing trying to manage the full SLP caseload and the rest of my duties. Thankfully I work with awesome people and have had help for the most part so the balancing act is working. However I am looking forward to the start of my new SLP, and the start of my first CF-Supervisory experience :)
 But that's not why I titled this "officially a growed up"

 Later this morning I head out on my first official "business trip" since graduating. It's kind of weird to think about and I'm a little anxious but I know it'll be fun to experience a new city. This won't be the first time Kenny and I have been separated by work in our marriage, but usually it's been him going on youth trips and me holding down the fort. Thank goodness he and Ellie are besties these days. So that's why I feel "growed up".

In other news, Matt (my "little" brother) and I are participating in a 5k fun run for Aim at Melanoma in honor of our dad. It should be a good time, since I haven't really trained for this one and Matt has been working his patootie off getting ready to run his first 5k. Say a little prayer that I don't get showed up by my baby brother. I promise to post pictures from that event, should be quite memorable.

 Blessings to each of you and I hope you have a magnificent Monday!

 

Stream of consciousness...

Honesty time. Lately I haven't felt much like blogging (probably because I'm not in the habit) but partially because I've been discouraged a bit.

On Sunday our pastor preached on faith and made a statement I've heard before but this time it hit me a little harder. Curtis said "God always answers prayer, but he answers in 3 ways; yes, no, or not yet."

 Recently I've been in a window of "not yet" and I am yearning for understanding as to why. I have been so focused on what I can control in my little world that I haven't been relying on God enough, if at all. Sure I say I am, but truly it's difficult to do (anyone who says it's easy is fibbing to you and themselves.) This stage in my life has been difficult (and still is) but sometimes I just need to remember that eventually I'll be able to look back and see the plan of it all.

As I was running wogging this morning I heard an older song from Francesca Battistelli and God gently poked me with reassurance that life will turn out just the way He wants it to. I don't usually post lyrics, but these ones touched me today so maybe it will touch someone else too!
  
Free to Be Me by Francesca Battistelli 

At twenty years of age I'm still looking for a dream
A war's already waged for my destiny
But You've already won the battle
And You've got great plans for me
Though I can’t always see

(Chorus)
 
‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender
Got a couple rips in my jeans
Try to fit the pieces together
But perfection is my enemy
On my own I'm so clumsy
But on Your shoulders I can see
I'm free to be me
When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out
My life would turn out right, and I'd make it here somehow
But things don't always come that easy
And sometimes I would doubt

(Chorus)

And you’re free to be you
Sometimes I believe that I can do anything
Yet other times I think I've got nothing good to bring
But You look at my heart and You tell me
That I've got all You seek
And it’s easy to believe
Even though 

(Chorus)

 I was kind of a quietly insubordinate child (good on the surface but those closer to me know that I could be devious if chosen). I think I've returned to those habits, or maybe always treated my relationship with God that way. I think that I'm being obedient and faithful and then I notice that I'm not completely so.

My prayer today for myself and for all my fellow wanderers is that God would reveal those areas of our lives that we hold tight to and plan for and expect God to bend to our wills and that He would gently teach us and show us how to do it the right way.

Love to all you folk out there! Have a Wonderful Wednesday!

 

where have we been hiding??

Good Morning Folks!
 I do in fact exist...life has just been a little crazy the last year-ish so I'll give you guys the reader's digest version to catch up.

Summer 2011: Kenny is being pursued by a church in Orland Park IL to become their next youth pastor, he accepts the position in late August.

September 2011: We move to Chicagoland just before our anniversary and prepare to hunker down in a super cold climate.

Fall/Winter 2011: Chicagoans don' know what to do with a mild winter and Kenny and I praise God for only 2 weekends of snow. :)

Spring 2012: God laid it on Kenny's and my hearts that Illinois would only be a temporary placement for us.

 March 2012: We begin the process of returning to Texas. Our house did not sell the entire 6 months it was on the market. My job in Texas was not filled the entire time we were gone, so I reapplied. I had to do like 4 serious phone interviews before I was offered the position, but God's will was for us to return to Houston so I got the job and we planned to move back.

April 2012: We are packing again...boo! We hadn't planned on IL being temporary, we got license plates, drivers licenses, car titles, toll tags, trashed/recycled all the moving boxes...here's to repeating the same move, but more expensive because everything is more expensive up North. I am sad to leave my job in Crestwood, I loved my team and my boss, not so keen on the skilled nursing setting, but now I can say I did it. We arrived back in Houston near the end of April, and promptly put everything back right where it had been 7 months before.

May 2012-present: I start back at my job and Kenny is on a little "sabbatical" waiting on God's direction for his next ministry opportunity (prayers for this much appreciated). We missed so much about Texas while we were gone and the number one thing was definitely our friends and family. It was very difficult to find the same kind of community where we were and it definitely made us appreciate the relationships and fellowship that we have here so much more.

Being back has been fun, we get to see all our favorite people and experience life with them. We have begun attending an awesome church and are eager to invest somewhere until God tells us where He is going to use Kenny next.

So where does that leave us right now you ask? Well we're kind of in a holding pattern, I am loving my work at RehabCare and enjoy the challenges management brings. Kenny is deep in the word daily and learning from teachings of other great pastors to keep his walk on track. We haven't had much success with opportunities for Kenny, and that has been difficult. We are definitely so blessed to have a house to move back to and a job for me to move back to but Kenny and I both feel that God is preparing him for something worth the wait. Friends, as you read this; say a little prayer for my Hubby, pray that God would continue to prepare him for an amazing opportunity and that He would pave the way to make it happen. (Feel free to add a sooner rather than later in there). We are so glad to be back in Texas and I will take the opportunity to re-start the blogging adventure...but just to be safe, don't hold your breath :) Blessings to you!

...hello...are you there??

Good Monday Morning All!

I realize it has been about 18 months since I posted....anything....so, though I'm pressed for time currently, I will be giving the reading-world an update about my (now married) life.

Blessings! and Stay Tuned!